Monday, September 29, 2003
A foul wind blew in Hatchburg this week. Hatchburgians are in a fricassee over foie gras. After reading Patricia Leigh Brown’s piece, "Foie Gras Fracas: Haute Cuisine Meets the Duck Liberators" (NewYork Times 9/24/03), Rosie organized FFF (Fowl Freedom Forever). She drafted a letter to the FDA calling foie gras nougatine style with hazelnuts and pistachios just another nutty liver made in the name of social decadence. Hatchburgains, led by Rosie and Jewel, joined in a silent sunrise protest on Bay Head Beach. The sun was so hot that Eve laid a soft boiled egg under the boardwalk. Joey passed out funnels and they marched up East Avenue. Jewel led them in a few lines from Catalani’s La Wally: "Né mai dunque avrú pace? E da pensieri tristi ognor sarú turbata?" They ended their protest at Mueller’s Bakery. They ordered sticky buns and cheese danish and ate them del Fabro style: with gusto on the street. Traffic was stopped all the way to the bay. In between bites they chanted “Fight Foie Gras! Fowl Freedom Forever!”
Hattie offered extended hours at Feathers Or Not. Ernestine and Thelma got sand stuck in their tail feathers after slipping on the sticky macadam in front of Mueller’s. Several others, including Glamour Girl, needed pecan extraction - Hattie obliged. All FFF members got $10 vouchers for the Roasted Corn (donated by Lorna). Jewel served corn fritters until closing and sang selections from La Wally. After serving the last chick the last fritter, she raised her outstretched arms and sang “Anima cara, aprimi le tue braccia!” and then she fell under the counter. Everyone climbed on the tables, Eloise laid two brown eggs (her first) on the spot and the rest clucked until Jewel sang an encore: "I Am Weary (Let Me Rest)" by the Cox Family.
Juliet misses Paul Krugman who is on vacation. She settles into her nest each night and whispers to the stars, “Come back to us Paul, soon soon!”
Monday morning, when Rosie opened the Roasted Corn she found a watercolor poster taped to the door: OPEN HOUSE SATURDAY NIGHT. 22 BEARNAISE PLACE. DINNER AND STRUTTING. BRING A DISH TO SHARE.
By noon Rosie was sold out of del Fabro’s carrot cake. Everyone wanted a second cup of coffee, a piece of cake and a chat about Saturday night.
Hattie offered extended hours at Feathers Or Not. Ernestine and Thelma got sand stuck in their tail feathers after slipping on the sticky macadam in front of Mueller’s. Several others, including Glamour Girl, needed pecan extraction - Hattie obliged. All FFF members got $10 vouchers for the Roasted Corn (donated by Lorna). Jewel served corn fritters until closing and sang selections from La Wally. After serving the last chick the last fritter, she raised her outstretched arms and sang “Anima cara, aprimi le tue braccia!” and then she fell under the counter. Everyone climbed on the tables, Eloise laid two brown eggs (her first) on the spot and the rest clucked until Jewel sang an encore: "I Am Weary (Let Me Rest)" by the Cox Family.
Juliet misses Paul Krugman who is on vacation. She settles into her nest each night and whispers to the stars, “Come back to us Paul, soon soon!”
Monday morning, when Rosie opened the Roasted Corn she found a watercolor poster taped to the door: OPEN HOUSE SATURDAY NIGHT. 22 BEARNAISE PLACE. DINNER AND STRUTTING. BRING A DISH TO SHARE.
By noon Rosie was sold out of del Fabro’s carrot cake. Everyone wanted a second cup of coffee, a piece of cake and a chat about Saturday night.
Wednesday, September 24, 2003
Wednesday afternoon, most Hatchburgians took the Amtrak Cresent to Greenville, South Carolina. A dozen chicks (The Dean Dozen) slept in one sleeper and they were as cozy as a dozen eggs in a cardboard carton. They stayed up all night eating popcorn and cold corn fritters made and packed by Rosie herself. They arrived as the sun cracked orange and ran over the Sassafras Mountains. On Sunday, they attended the spectacular dedication of Prince of Peace Church, Taylors, South Carolina. They all had weak chicken legs when they got their first glimpse of Pietro’s art. They voted the art five kernels, and Pietro six kernels. Worth a journey and more. They strutted down the center aisle and sat in the first row, courtesy of Pietro. They sang like songbirds, and their sweet song, carried by the breath of the wind, could be heard as far away as Hatchburg. Pietro floated on clouds of admiration and respect, and his joy burned golden on the crucifix as the light of evening found its voice.
Joey and Reba's train to Greenville was cancelled due to Hurricane Isabel. They opened del Fabro’s Don’t Even Think About It and read the chapter "Dealing With A Bad Deal." They took her advice and rented The Big Easy and did what you have to do after tasting the spicy sparks that Ellen Barkin and Dennis Quaid make on the wing. Reba fell into a dead chicken pose every time Quaid took his shirt off.
Saturday night, all the girls celebrated Pietro at 33 Liberty. On her way to the restaurant, Eloise gave up on the South Beach Diet. Chef John came to their table and presented Rosie with a bag of freshly ground corn meal to take home. No one told Rosie, but they think that 33 Liberty’s corn bread is a major contender for the Roasted Corn’s blue ribbon. John makes a mean fried eggplant with mozzarella too, and his peach crisp is five-kernel. The Dean Dozen fell in love with John and 33 Liberty.
Hattie and Thelma decided to raise a few feathers among their new friends and give them copies of Paul Krugman’s The Great Unraveling: Losing Our Way in the New Century, as thank you gifts for their southern hospitality. They went to Greenville’s Barnes & Noble but they couldn’t find a single copy. The clerk said “I know they are here somewhere; I just can’t find them.” Hattie figured they were under a bush somewhere in the basement.
Along the lake that is Geneva, William Smith chicks got out their sweaters and put some more straw in the mattresses. They dialed Hatchburg for the Scratch, but no one was home.
One year ago today the universe lost one of its finest: Richard Peltz. A small gathering is planned at his grave. Juliet will read a poem and there will be talk of his chicken curry and his nan. We still bear the sorrow.
Joey and Reba's train to Greenville was cancelled due to Hurricane Isabel. They opened del Fabro’s Don’t Even Think About It and read the chapter "Dealing With A Bad Deal." They took her advice and rented The Big Easy and did what you have to do after tasting the spicy sparks that Ellen Barkin and Dennis Quaid make on the wing. Reba fell into a dead chicken pose every time Quaid took his shirt off.
Saturday night, all the girls celebrated Pietro at 33 Liberty. On her way to the restaurant, Eloise gave up on the South Beach Diet. Chef John came to their table and presented Rosie with a bag of freshly ground corn meal to take home. No one told Rosie, but they think that 33 Liberty’s corn bread is a major contender for the Roasted Corn’s blue ribbon. John makes a mean fried eggplant with mozzarella too, and his peach crisp is five-kernel. The Dean Dozen fell in love with John and 33 Liberty.
Hattie and Thelma decided to raise a few feathers among their new friends and give them copies of Paul Krugman’s The Great Unraveling: Losing Our Way in the New Century, as thank you gifts for their southern hospitality. They went to Greenville’s Barnes & Noble but they couldn’t find a single copy. The clerk said “I know they are here somewhere; I just can’t find them.” Hattie figured they were under a bush somewhere in the basement.
Along the lake that is Geneva, William Smith chicks got out their sweaters and put some more straw in the mattresses. They dialed Hatchburg for the Scratch, but no one was home.
One year ago today the universe lost one of its finest: Richard Peltz. A small gathering is planned at his grave. Juliet will read a poem and there will be talk of his chicken curry and his nan. We still bear the sorrow.
Tuesday, September 16, 2003
Henniway you look at it, fall’s appetizers are on the ground in Hatchburg and they taste good.
Ernestine is back from Rome. The weather was hot but every afternoon she cooled off in the fountain in Campo de’ Fiori. She took the train to Florence for a few days and imagined riding in a carriage with Pansy and Isabel Archer. She climbed the steps of San Miniato al Monte and watched the moon rise above the heads of adolescents kissing in Piazzale San Michelangelo. She wished she had a Lord Warburton to strut with her down Via de’ Calzaiuoli, but instead she let herself get picked up in the Piazza della Signora by a Gilbert Osmnod type. He stuck her for the bill at Rivoli. When she returned from the toilettes, he had flown the coop and the bill was under his cappuccino cup.
Eloise resigned her job at IKEA to become a disciple for Dr. Agatston.
Phil and Johnny had their third date. They went to the Roasted Corn for fritters and fries and then they strutted back to Johnny’s. They rented Jonathan Harvey’s Beautiful Thing and when it was over they put on Mama Cass and pretended to be Jamie and Ste. It was beautiful.
Joey and Reba made a trip to the Finger Lakes and stopped in Geneva to visit chicks Cathy and Leila. They went to Uncle Joe’s and it was a perfect evening until the server put down a plate of Buffalo wings. They walked out and had salads at Saga instead.
Saturday night, Ruby, Hattie and Thelma were arrested for putting Howard Dean bumper stickers on every car in the Peck Rite parking lot. Lorna made bail for them.
Juliet spotted Paul Krugman at Peck and Shop she but was too shy to speak to him. While he weighed his plucots, she scratched him a note and slipped into his cart in between the broccoli florets. She's not chicken to say his new book The Great Unraveling: Losing Our Way in the New Century is right on the corn.
All’s quiet at 22 Bearnaise Place.
Ernestine is back from Rome. The weather was hot but every afternoon she cooled off in the fountain in Campo de’ Fiori. She took the train to Florence for a few days and imagined riding in a carriage with Pansy and Isabel Archer. She climbed the steps of San Miniato al Monte and watched the moon rise above the heads of adolescents kissing in Piazzale San Michelangelo. She wished she had a Lord Warburton to strut with her down Via de’ Calzaiuoli, but instead she let herself get picked up in the Piazza della Signora by a Gilbert Osmnod type. He stuck her for the bill at Rivoli. When she returned from the toilettes, he had flown the coop and the bill was under his cappuccino cup.
Eloise resigned her job at IKEA to become a disciple for Dr. Agatston.
Phil and Johnny had their third date. They went to the Roasted Corn for fritters and fries and then they strutted back to Johnny’s. They rented Jonathan Harvey’s Beautiful Thing and when it was over they put on Mama Cass and pretended to be Jamie and Ste. It was beautiful.
Joey and Reba made a trip to the Finger Lakes and stopped in Geneva to visit chicks Cathy and Leila. They went to Uncle Joe’s and it was a perfect evening until the server put down a plate of Buffalo wings. They walked out and had salads at Saga instead.
Saturday night, Ruby, Hattie and Thelma were arrested for putting Howard Dean bumper stickers on every car in the Peck Rite parking lot. Lorna made bail for them.
Juliet spotted Paul Krugman at Peck and Shop she but was too shy to speak to him. While he weighed his plucots, she scratched him a note and slipped into his cart in between the broccoli florets. She's not chicken to say his new book The Great Unraveling: Losing Our Way in the New Century is right on the corn.
All’s quiet at 22 Bearnaise Place.
Tuesday, September 09, 2003
Joey picked the last few tomatoes from his garden and made eggs over easy with baked tomatoes and pine nuts. Reba dropped in just as he took his first bite of egg. She sat on his front porch until it was over. They had dessert together (Del Fabro’s carrot cake again) and then they watched the 3rd season of Friends. They loved the scene where Joey buys Chandler a chick. Chickita, Reba’s chicklette from her first marriage, played the chick.
Eve listened to George Bush’s speech and then mixed up a batch of del Fabros and called Eloise, Thelma, and Louise over to drink and write songs to George. Eloise couldn’t drink; she is still on Phase One of the South Beach Diet. She made a second batch of del Fabros while the chicks wrote a song for Bush to the tune of "Nowhere to Run” by Martha Reeves and The Vandellas. They cracked up over “Everywhere I go your eyes I see - I know you’re ly’in to me.”
Phil had his second date with Johnny Fritz. They went to Andrée’s Best Bowl where they both threw one gutter ball after another. Afterwards they went back to Phil’s and baked a batch of madelines. Phil asked Johnny to read out loud from Remembrance of Things Past. When Phil dozed off, Johnny put the book down and nestled next to him on Phil’s grandmother’s wedding quilt.
Hattie gave Eve a new combdo that has the coup cackling with envy. Hattie stayed up all night after “Bushie’s” speech. She wrote him a short note (Dear GB, Stop with the line from 9/11 to Iraq, we’re chickens but we’re not eggsactly stupid. PS: $87 billion? I think you're cracked.) She tucked the note into a copy of Ronald B. Tobias’s Theme & Strategy: How to Build a Strong Narrative Structure to Help Your Fiction Stand Tall, Run Fast, Hit Hard, and Soar to Success. She drew a line through the last six words and mailed it off with a not-too-clean straw bookmark.
Sunday at dusk, Juliet returned to Hatchburg after a day with Jeffrey Zeig, Ph.D. She attended his seminar: "Settling the Unsettled: Integrating Approaches to Anxiety Disorders." She put her feathers in his hands and the rest is a mystery. Her clients think she’s transformed.
Thelma brought a batch of jelly donuts to 22 Bearnaise Place. No one answered the bell so she left them on the front porch.
Eve listened to George Bush’s speech and then mixed up a batch of del Fabros and called Eloise, Thelma, and Louise over to drink and write songs to George. Eloise couldn’t drink; she is still on Phase One of the South Beach Diet. She made a second batch of del Fabros while the chicks wrote a song for Bush to the tune of "Nowhere to Run” by Martha Reeves and The Vandellas. They cracked up over “Everywhere I go your eyes I see - I know you’re ly’in to me.”
Phil had his second date with Johnny Fritz. They went to Andrée’s Best Bowl where they both threw one gutter ball after another. Afterwards they went back to Phil’s and baked a batch of madelines. Phil asked Johnny to read out loud from Remembrance of Things Past. When Phil dozed off, Johnny put the book down and nestled next to him on Phil’s grandmother’s wedding quilt.
Hattie gave Eve a new combdo that has the coup cackling with envy. Hattie stayed up all night after “Bushie’s” speech. She wrote him a short note (Dear GB, Stop with the line from 9/11 to Iraq, we’re chickens but we’re not eggsactly stupid. PS: $87 billion? I think you're cracked.) She tucked the note into a copy of Ronald B. Tobias’s Theme & Strategy: How to Build a Strong Narrative Structure to Help Your Fiction Stand Tall, Run Fast, Hit Hard, and Soar to Success. She drew a line through the last six words and mailed it off with a not-too-clean straw bookmark.
Sunday at dusk, Juliet returned to Hatchburg after a day with Jeffrey Zeig, Ph.D. She attended his seminar: "Settling the Unsettled: Integrating Approaches to Anxiety Disorders." She put her feathers in his hands and the rest is a mystery. Her clients think she’s transformed.
Thelma brought a batch of jelly donuts to 22 Bearnaise Place. No one answered the bell so she left them on the front porch.
Tuesday, September 02, 2003
Fall is in the air in Hatchburg. Joey helped Glamour Girl and Reba move their nests inside.
Hens and roosters alike are still talking about the Botoff/Belezza wedding at the Knowlton Mansion on Sunday. The Slippery Band kept everyone spinning. Phil and Don lost a few feathers during the electronica set. Reba cried during the groom and mother dance ("In My Life" by the Beatles). Rosie pronounced Slippery the best band ever. She’s a sucker for men in three-button suits. Hattie ate one of each dessert and then finished off the chocolate-dipped cashews that were on the table. Juilet pronounced the bride and groom a perfect match, and Miss Higgs stayed up all night swooning over the groom (Anthony). Whenever he smiled she felt her gizzard tremble. Joey had his eye on Alisha but she doesn’t eat eggs.
Thelma and Louise plastered Howard Dean Posters (The Doctor is In) all over town. Rosie took 12 bumper stickers and put them in the stalls in the chicks and rooster lavatories at the Roasted Corn. Ernestine thought they overdid it but Louise said: “You’ll be sitting alone in your coop when we have his victory party.”
Ruby says that fowl are one thing but fouling the Clean Air Act is just another Bush foul ball.
Eloise started the Palm Beach diet.
Queenie saw lights on at 2AM at 22 Bearnaise Place, and from the upstairs front window she heard what sounded like Emmylou Harris singing “Love Hurts.”
Hens and roosters alike are still talking about the Botoff/Belezza wedding at the Knowlton Mansion on Sunday. The Slippery Band kept everyone spinning. Phil and Don lost a few feathers during the electronica set. Reba cried during the groom and mother dance ("In My Life" by the Beatles). Rosie pronounced Slippery the best band ever. She’s a sucker for men in three-button suits. Hattie ate one of each dessert and then finished off the chocolate-dipped cashews that were on the table. Juilet pronounced the bride and groom a perfect match, and Miss Higgs stayed up all night swooning over the groom (Anthony). Whenever he smiled she felt her gizzard tremble. Joey had his eye on Alisha but she doesn’t eat eggs.
Thelma and Louise plastered Howard Dean Posters (The Doctor is In) all over town. Rosie took 12 bumper stickers and put them in the stalls in the chicks and rooster lavatories at the Roasted Corn. Ernestine thought they overdid it but Louise said: “You’ll be sitting alone in your coop when we have his victory party.”
Ruby says that fowl are one thing but fouling the Clean Air Act is just another Bush foul ball.
Eloise started the Palm Beach diet.
Queenie saw lights on at 2AM at 22 Bearnaise Place, and from the upstairs front window she heard what sounded like Emmylou Harris singing “Love Hurts.”
